[TriLUG] Palmer for another SC term; proposed amendment to the bylaws

John Brier johnbrier at gmail.com
Fri Apr 26 17:03:13 EDT 2013


On 04/26/2013 04:29 PM, Chris Merrill wrote:
> 
> FWIW, I attended a TriLUG meeting many years ago. I came away with the same
> impression and never came back.  People threw out comments and jokes so
> much I felt like the speaker could not get through the material and it
> was hard to follow when he could. By comparison with TriJUG meetings,
> it seemed poorly run and childish. I gather that has changed somewhat
> (a lot?), but that was my impression at the time.  I don't recall if any
> of the jokes were sexist...I probably wouldn't have noticed because I
> was so annoyed with the entire atmosphere.
> 
> As a datapoint, there were a lot more women at the well-run TriJUG meetings.
> I don't know if they have a policy, but it _was_ a more "welcoming" group.
> 

I have only come to a few meetings and rarely keep up with the email
list or other TriLUG happenings so I don't feel like I have much of a
relationship to put my opinion out there on this subject, regardless, as
I've been reading this thread I have been remembering some of my
experiences. In general I went to more meetings when I first moved to
Raleigh in 2007 and haven't been to a meeting in at least a year, maybe
two so that will give you a time reference for what I'm referring to.

In the past I too noticed a similar immature behavior among attendees.
In particular I remember a time when a colleague of mine gave a
presentation that included a typo in one of his slides. There were
enough side conversations and jokes about this typo that it flustered
the presenter, which was unfortunate because he knows a lot about the
subject he was presenting on.

This general immature behavior coupled with even unconscious sexism,
much less overt sexism absolutely could make for an unwelcome
environment for people unlike the majority of white men that come to the
events TriLUG puts on.

I really like this point Kevin Otte made, as it is what I was thinking
too when I was informed of this thread:

On 04/25/2013 10:20 AM, Kevin Otte wrote:> While we're throwing around
logical fallacies, how about this: If you're
> not doing anything wrong, what do you have to fear from these rules
> existing?

The fact that men are threatened by a request to not harass women is an
unconscious acknowledgement of their privilege.

Let go of your privilege to say whatever you want regardless of the
unwelcoming environment it may foster and you will find that you won't
have to seek out women and others unlike yourselves to come to your
events, they will come on their own.


I also want to say I really like this point:

On 04/25/2013 03:30 PM, Brandon Van Every wrote:
>
> Given the overwhelming gender imbalance in the computer industry, I
frankly
> wouldn't lose sleep if the policy said "men who say X Y Z will be shot on
> sight."  ;-)  A certain level of exaggeration is tolerable because in the
> real world, policies have almost no force.  Doing anything that even
> suggests having a policy, no matter how sloppily or callously worded,
is to
> the good, as social reprogramming of people's deeply entrenched habits is
> very very difficult.  A policy pretty much spits in an ocean of deep
> economic and educational imbalance, that makes the landscape what it
is, so
> if the policy is a big jaw stocking hockey of a spitball... who cares?
 why
> worry?  No manhood is likely to be impuned in the making of this film.
>
> I'll reconsider my "it doesn't matter what it says" position when women
> prove that they actually *do* have some power at a TriLUG meeting and
> really *are* making some men uncomfortable with it.  At which point, I
> would say "Aha!  The shoe is on the other foot, what a great exercise in
> empathy" and ask for people to wordsmith something to deal with it.  Until
> that's a working reality....
>
>
> Cheers,
> Brandon
> who is really sick of the gender imbalance of this industry, and thinks
> steps must be taken in broad strokes
>

-- 
gpg: 1024D/251D9FF9 6F7B 242A 9375 F4CC BC6D  F453 60D8 35FF 251D 9FF9

http://cupcakecarnival.net



More information about the TriLUG mailing list